The five picks are grouped into three steps, lightest commitment first. Start with 1–2 (scrub and lubricant), see how it lands, and move on to 3–5 from there. This table is the whole article in short form.
Prices change over time, so none are listed here. Check today's figure on each product page.
A first couples purchase is safer as a consumable than as a toy. It is easier to raise with a partner, and if it does not land, little is lost.
Geukrak Scrub — the night starts in the shower
Sex does not start in bed, it starts in the shower. One scrub used together turns the getting-ready into foreplay. Geukrak Scrub is a body scrub designed with couples' massage in mind, and it comes in two moods — Magnetic Love (a rice-cake texture) and Lazy Love (mud). Simply putting it on each other lowers the threshold for touch.
Who it suits: long-together couples who find setting a mood awkward now / anyone looking for an easy first couple gift
Geukrak Gel — a water-based lube, the basics for couples
If you buy only one thing, make it the lube. Lubrication is the cheapest and surest upgrade there is: less pain, more sensation. Geukrak Gel is a smooth water-based gel made to resemble the body's own fluid, so it barely registers as a foreign substance, and it is safe to use with toys. The single-use ampoule format is hygienic and easy to pack for a trip.
Who it suits: every couple. For anyone who has had pain or dryness during sex, it is essential
When to move on — once you have used the scrub and the gel together and your partner was not put off, that is the moment to bring up step 2.
For a couple new to couples toys, a “machine” can be a lot. Dame Fin is a finger vibrator worn on a finger, so it adds vibration on top of something already familiar — a partner's touch. It is the lowest barrier a couples toy comes in. Verified buyers put it plainly: “Strong motor, almost no noise.” It comes in two colours, Citrus and Quartz.
Who it suits: couples trying a toy together for the first time / anyone looking for middle ground with a partner who says “I prefer hands to machines”
When to move on — once using a toy together feels ordinary, the next step is something worn during sex.
From here these are not things used alone but toys used together, during sex. They take more conversation, which is exactly why they come last.
Dame Eva — hands-free, worn during sex
The signature couples' toy from Dame, the New York brand founded by an MIT scientist. It is worn on the vulva, hands-free, so clitoral stimulation can be added during sex without using a hand.
Why that matters: only a minority of women reach orgasm from penetration alone (about 18%, per a 2017 survey study of 1,055 adult women in the USA). Eva closes that gap without stopping what you are doing.
Who it suits: couples who have felt the orgasm gap / anyone who has tried adding clitoral stimulation during sex and found a hand awkward
Dame Hug — a couples' ring worn by the male partner
The last piece is, unexpectedly, on the man's side. Hug is a vibrating cock ring worn by the male partner. It changes what the wearer feels, and because the partner is pressed against it during sex, the vibration reaches both of them. For couples who have felt self-conscious that “only the women's toys keep piling up,” it also restores a sense of balance.
Who it suits: anyone looking for a pick the male partner enjoys too / couples who want toys to be “ours” rather than “hers”
If you want Eva weighed against other toys from a couple's point of view, that comparison lives in its own article, and there is a separate write-up of using Hug. This article only answers what to buy first.
- Talk to your partner first: choosing together does more for the relationship than quietly preparing a toy and going “ta-da.” Sharing this article with them is one way to start
- Every couple is different: the combination that works varies. Start with 1–2 (scrub and gel), see how it lands, and move on to 3–5
- Everything here is authentic: AROOO is the official importer and seller for Dame. No counterfeit worries, and the warranty applies
- AROOO, “A Room of One's Own” content
- Herbenick D et al., Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy (2017)